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Forgiveness…

Carrying around resentment, anger, and hate is bad for our own emotional and spirtual well being.To forgive is to lift a weight from ourselves and someone
else.It is also a necessary tool for sucessful relationships and general life happiness.Most of us have moments of blind stubborness and all we can feel is our
own pain and injustice. We take all these negative emotions and smash them into a little ball that we carry around in our hearts and hanging on our subconcious.

Forgiveness is what God gave to the human race when we were too blind to see his glory here on earth. He was wise enough to see above selfish pain, grudges or
vengence and He gave us a glorious example of the love and forgiveness.
When someoneone is wronged or betrayed, they suffer emotional wounds which can give feelings such as anger, guilt, rage, resentment, or shame. Forgiving a wrong or betrayal is a process of emotional healing where such painful feelings are worked
through and ultimately resolved. Forgiving for the sake of our own inner healing and well being is important. forgiveness is beautiful.

Forgiving happens inside the person who does it. Forgiving welcomes but does not depend upon the apology of the the one who you have been injured by.

We can forgive in our hearts before we ever say the words “I forgive.” it does not matter if you choose to express forgiveness directly to the one who has injured
you,because you will feel it deeply either way.Give it a try, forgive someone who has wronged you or forgive yourself for the wrong you have done.

Some of the most beautiful relationships and moments are born of forgiveness and after all we are all just human beings who sin and and make mistakes.

good luck and success in the self forgiveness and that of others!
your friend ,
Constantin

P.S. Please post your comments about this article below

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Written by admin on January 22nd, 2007 with 36 comments.
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36 comments

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Shawna
#1. January 22nd, 2007, at 6:39 PM.

This is truley a sign from God! I have been struggling with anger and forgiveness for the past little bit. I finally decided to forgive the person who made me mad, but I did it just enough to make HIM feel better. It didn’t help me any. Now I know that all that’s going to make me feel better is to forgive and forget. Thanks!

Judith
#2. January 22nd, 2007, at 7:37 PM.

I really enjoyed the article and I just wanted to say thanks for the subject that you used. People don’t understand that it’s not about the person who hurt you, but for your own well being and spiritual growth. How can one grow spiritually while holding a grudge, hate, or anger in their hearts? Thanks for the article.

steve
#3. January 22nd, 2007, at 7:39 PM.

forgiving is one of which I find hard to do, thats why I & my daughter have a bad relationship I can’t forgive her for whats she’s done eventhough I want to, everything just keeps repeating it self over over again but if I don’t forgive her I know that I won’t be in GOD’S likeness, that I won’t see him as he is, that I’ll be a hypocrite.
Thanks this message was for me.

Lily Ho
#4. January 22nd, 2007, at 8:48 PM.

This article is a wonderful reminder to us.
For all of last year I was in deep pain and could not forgive my husband for his infidelity and that he is betraying me a second time. But towards the end of 2006, by God’s grace, I know that I MUST move on and forgive even though he continues to live with this woman. God has been very good to me and I feel a lot better once I made the choice to forgive.
It is indeed the only choice if we want the Holy Spirit to work in us and to change evil to good.

Zoe
#5. January 22nd, 2007, at 9:59 PM.

My answer is … Yes, I choose to forgive. The best example I heard about forgiveness was this …. “forgiveness” is NOT paying someone back … or making them pay for what they have done to you.
It is nice to know that If I have to keep boundaries with someone I could, but would not be doing it to re-pay. Indeed I would be doing it for healthy and sound reasons especially in cases of abuse. I guess it all comes down to ……. ” Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us” …. for me, it is where my heart and attitude is at BIG time ! :)

TeeYem
#6. January 23rd, 2007, at 12:08 AM.

hey constantin- i’m a regular reader of ur blog n’ man u sometimes address issues that i can really really relate to..n’ i know its part of God’s supreme plan progressively working out in my life..step by step-i started reading the Bible about 7 months bak mainly cos i wanted to take my mind off a broken relationship..the wounds were taking too long to heal- and i know for a fact that little by little the Lord was teaching my how to love and let go..the Lord has been so good to me..Hate is baggage..i even liked the article u wrote on regret-i sent it to my girlfriend too-it made sense to her as well..u r a blessing man-keep goin.God bless u too

Deborah
#7. January 23rd, 2007, at 1:05 AM.

Hi Constantin i’m really glad that i can also share with others how wonderfully God has healed me, after i choose to forgive and forget my ex-husband, it took me three years to come out of the hurt and pain, i’m no longer in bondage because of bitterness, what really amazed me, was when i started to experienced how my joy came back bit by bit and today i’m free, God even gave me a second chance to be married again to a man He has chosen for me, as a missionary worker from Egypt prophesied over us and blessed us as a couple while there was no kind of relationship. God is amazing … and He is Goooooooood! ALWAYS . . . . .!

Fordson
#8. January 23rd, 2007, at 1:38 AM.

Dear Constantine,
Wow, this is an excellent article. You are right, if we dont forgive, we are “…carrying around resentment, anger, and hate [which] is bad for our own emotional and spirtual well being. To forgive is to lift a weight from ourselves and someone else..!” What a revelation!

Remember the story of the unforgiving servant in the Bible? It is recorded that because he did not forgive, even after he was forgiven of a bigger debt, he was handed over to the jailers (tormentors!!!). This is what the devil does if we don’t forgive. He actually torments us and the end results is destruction. We hate and hurt so much that we destroy first our bodies and then our soul.

This world would be a wonderful place to live in if all of us would identify the source of these frictions (who is the devil) and deal with him squarely. No wonder Jesus told Peter, “get behind me satan.” This was not to mean that Peter had turned into a devil, but that he was under the influence of satan! The lesson behind this statement is for all Christians and non Christians to know that the devil is the one behind all the frictions we have with one another. Our brothers and sisters are innocent, but just being used of the devil. Why then can’t we forgive our brothers/sisiters and deal with the devil instead?

God help us!

Jeanette Wei
#9. January 23rd, 2007, at 1:54 AM.

Hi Constantin,

I appreciate your article ” Forgiveness”. It is so encourageing and helpful. Sometimes it is not that easy to forgive the one who breaks our hearts, but by the love and grace of God, we will be able to do so and our hearts will fill with joy and peace.

Thank you for the message, Constantin.

May God bless you!

Yours in Christ,

Jeanette

Linda
#10. January 23rd, 2007, at 2:34 AM.

Hi

I am reminded to forgive just by reading your article. I believe in God and he has sent this wonderful message thru u. I am speechless but I feel tears welling and know that God is my comforter. I must and will be convicted by His Holy Spirit to forgive. I set tough guidelines in my life, expecially after being hurt badly. I know I have not been able to forgive others easily. I yearn for the Lord everyday, every minute because He loves me so. I hate what has happened to me. Forgiveness is so difficult when others are so obliging.

arletta
#11. January 23rd, 2007, at 6:26 AM.

I lost my husband when I was 42, he passed at 41, it was 8 yrs. before I really felt that God had sent me a true someone so simular to my late husband, so kind, so caring & compasionate, to say the least he was so like me… always laughing and treating others with acts of kindness. Thats what really got my attention with this guy…but there was just one thing…. I was not saved…. and he was married… we were not lovers mind you but best of friends…. but that can get you in trouble also when your there are alterior motives, to make a long story short I came into a relationship unbeknownst to this man with alot of money, making bad investments, I lost all of that. We had

LeAnn Adams
#12. January 23rd, 2007, at 7:01 AM.

Our Heavenly Father has shown me the true meaning of unconditional forgivness. Will try to make this short.
My daughter was 2 1/2 yrs old and my Dad was living with us. I was at work this Sat. and felt such a tug on my spirit to go home that I shut the computer down and went home. I walked in on my Dad in the act of raping my 2 1/2 yr old. You must understand that I had such a love for my Dad and a different but as equal a love for my daughter. Long story short is he ended up going to jail and I went every week to visit him…my love for him never failed and I had to go through this to gain forgivness and Our Father granted me such peace with it. My daughter turned out ok as I had her in therapy most of her life…she has no resentments either. My Dad got saved before leaving this world….I know, I was there.

Thanks for letting me reply to your blog,
Sparrow7~ aka LeAnn~

arletta
#13. January 23rd, 2007, at 7:22 AM.

i was in the middle of a message & it stopped what happened?

arletta
#14. January 23rd, 2007, at 8:14 AM.

IT IS A MUST! YOU MUST FORGIVE, TO MOVE ON! My son & I had everything we had taken from us by someone I considered to be a friend, You see, I was not the only victim, nor my son. There were other families that were hurt behind everything that came out. He & I were business partners/friends. (lovers) Need I say both unsaved, you could not tell me that this man was my everything. yes we started out being the best of friends, he even fed me lines about a wife living in a different state (when you’re living under the devil’s influence and not the Lord’s you can go for anything, IN WHICH I DID!) My husband had died 7 years earlier. When I met this man I had already known several members of his family. I had a little money in the bank ( which that was not an option for him, he was very giving, & kind ) he reminded me of me, always trying to help family out. Well anyway, something happened shortly after we got our business plans stared in which I had to deplete all of my funds. I got behind in my house payments by 4 months, after going over options,(house was being forclosed, I only had 6 months to redeem, 4 1/2 had passsed ) I decided to put my home up for sale, and salvage what proceeds I could for the time being. After all I was awaiting a large settlement check from my attorney, the balance of a lawsuit that I had settled. Well ……my business partner got wind of it ( through me ) told me that he could save my house for me, just sale him the house & he would sell the house back to me after the 1 year, Oh I was so happy ( I really LOVED HIM then) Well he was in a different state we did all transfer by wire he saved my house, by that time I had recieved my large check I sent him the closing costs, over $5thousand dollars, that he said I would have to pay, and since his wife didn’t have anything to do with him& I they were still legally bound to do everything as one, so that being her john hancock had to be on the contracts also, which in my eyes were fine, I was so happy that these folks were saving my house, (you see the devil have you so blind sighted you can’t even see the real picture)Anyway I went on to spend the rest of my money building & preparing the business for opening that we went into together ( in the city where I live, grew up in family & fiends live here all our lives… while he lived out of state with his family. He lived here with me ( again , I was to was under attack )for 4 months . I had my house remolded, new doors, siding windows. When it came time for the business to open We were really doing well, but I notice a change in attitude, threatning behavior, locks changed, ( lying, saying I took the keys and he had to get more made) and he wanted to see and attorney…..next came the house…..IF YOU DON’T FIGHT ME WITH THE BUSINESS, YOU CAN KEEP THE HOUSE, JUST KEEP MSKING THE PAYMENTS AND I WILL SELL IT BACK TO YOU AS I PROMISED . Well we went to court I lost the house because of proper procedure, we settled out of court for the business. But as the Judge for the house declared that he may have won in this court, but clearly he has another judge that will judge him, & unless he makes it right he will not win in that court either. Now I say that to say this. God forgave us many many, times,undeservingly as such, I know theres scripture that says so, we have to in turn forgive. I know today, that what this man did HE & HIS FAMILY LIVES IN A HOUSE THAT ONCE BELONGED TO MY SON & I … A BUSINESS THAT I FOUNDED…BUILD FROM GROUND UP…EVEN NAMED…PAINTED A MURAL ON THE SIDE HE PAID SOME ONE IN 1 HR TO WHITE IT OUT IT TOOK ME 1 MONTH TO PAINT 8 7FT LIFELIKE FIGURES ON THIS BLD. BUT GOD GAVE ME TALENT THAT HE CAN NEVER ERASE, AND WHATS MORE THROUGH ALL THIS CATASTROPHY, GOD BROUGHT ME TO REALIZE THAT THROUGH ALL THINGS MY HELP COMES THROUGH HIM, PUT MY TRUST IN NO MAN. I KNOW THAT IF MY SON & I HAD NOT FORGIVEN THIS MAN & LEARNED THE TRU MEANING , I MEAN THE TRUE MEANING OF WHY WE MUST FORGIVE, WHY GOD GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON JESUS CHRIST OUR SAVOIR. TODAY I CAN’T IMAGINE WHERE MY TEEN WOULD BE IF HE TOOK THE ATTITUDE OF REVENGE IN HIS HANDS OF HOW THIS MAN TOOK ADVANTAGE OF HIS MOTHER, EVEN SOME OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS WHO ARE NOT SAVED BUT THEY LISTEN AND THEY LET THE DEVIL KNOW THAT HE HAS TO STRUGGLE WITH THEM, BECAUSE THEY DID NOT LIKE THE FACT OF WHAT THIS MAN DID TO MY SON & I. ALL THE HUMILITY THE SHAME & ABOVE ALLTHIS HE WENT OUT & TURN EVERYTHING AROUND & LIED ON ME AND MY SON. FILTHY LIES, MAKING HIMSELF LOOK LIKE A CHILD OF GOD, LIKE SOMEONE WHO WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP A WIDOW & SON IN NEED. WHERE FOR OVER 3 YRS WE WERE IN A RELATIONSHIP IT WAS AWFUL, DEVASTATING, MY FAMILY WAS FLOORED. HE ACTED LIKE HE DID NOT EVEN KNOW MY FAMILY,THEY WERE SO UPSET WITH WHAT HE HAD DID TO US…………. AT THIS TIME I HAD CAME TO KNOW THE LORD , MY SON & I …I ASKED ALL OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS TO LISTEN TO WHAT HAD HAPPENED, I TOOK MY SHARE OF RESPONSIBILTY ALSO. IF I HAD KNOWN THE LORD AND HIS FORGIVENESS OF MY PAST, I WOULDN’T HAVE BEEN THERE THEN, SOMETIMES WE CARRY THINGS ON SO LONG THAT WE FEEL LIKE WE HAVE TO ALWAYS LIVE LESS THAN…… AND I ‘M HERE TOO SAY THAT WE DON’T . WE DON’T HAVE TOO. GOD FORGIVES US UNDESERVINGLY SO MANY MANY TIMES IN OUR LIVES….WE MUST IN TURN… FORGIVE.. I HAVE NOTHING BUT THE LOVE OF GOD IN MY HEART FOR THIS MAN & HIS FAMILY TODAY… & I PRAY THAT PRAYER FOR ALL, IT IS A MUST.

Nathaniel L. Hardimon
#15. January 23rd, 2007, at 10:12 AM.

I really appreciate the Forgiveness article, it is good to forgivie if you would want God to forgive you back you know, me myself I always forgive a person who does me wrong cause God is to good to me I adore him and love him very dearly. Forgiveness it’s not something that you have to do but it’s a desicion some people have to make on their own you know. I really thank you very much and you take care of yourselve and God bless you very much. Later

sherry
#16. January 23rd, 2007, at 1:42 PM.

This totally hit the spot for me in the way you used the words. I have been so betrayed by many, my sister was the worst and i now see if i dont have to call her, yet can forgive in my heart n forget it i can move on. thank you for this. it is an enlightningment.

melanie brown
#17. January 23rd, 2007, at 2:02 PM.

i read this and thought straight away that i suffer with resentment and anger and i need forgiveness for this so i ask god to forgive me for having all they to deal with

melanie brown
#18. January 23rd, 2007, at 2:03 PM.

i read this and thought straight away that i suffer with resentment and anger and i need forgiveness for this so i ask god to forgive me for having all these
to deal with

missy
#19. January 24th, 2007, at 1:56 AM.

This article made me think of my situation again and will try to slove it in God’s way. I really want to hear what God wants me to do. Forgiveness can be easy but also can be difficult that could everybody struggled. I love my family. May God bless all of us.

c.s.h
#20. January 24th, 2007, at 5:41 AM.

Thanks for the article. It sure had helped to heal my wound by a lot. Auctually, I felt like I had forgiven those that had once hurt me emotionally, but yet not know how to show forgiveness. The real problem is, they are still hurting me! It just doesn’t make sense to me to forgive someone when he/she hasn’t even stopped or repented. What should I do? Anyone has an idea?

chyvonne
#21. January 24th, 2007, at 8:57 PM.

this is a good point you made on for giveness, it has to come from with in that person.

HYlie
#22. January 25th, 2007, at 4:26 AM.

Hi constantine,

thanks indeed for reminding me to submit myself for forgiveness.
Jesus himself is Lord and Saviour, pure, ferpect and righteous but He died for our sins on the cross. He loves us and wants to save us from the slavery of sin.

ann boreland
#23. January 26th, 2007, at 6:04 AM.

thanks so much for the e-mail on resentment and what happens to us when we hold on to it and grow it. I really needed to hear that. i get lost sometimes just like everyone i start running on self will instead of gods will. keep those e-mails comming. God Bless. ann

vl
#24. January 28th, 2007, at 7:35 AM.

I truly hope that this person that I truly love will read this message and be able to forgive and move on forward in the relationship to see what the Lord is trying to show him in order that he will be able to receive all the blessings promised through obedience, or feel the door close to those blessings. After He tries for so long to get someone to see and obey and they do not, He will close the door to the Blessings just as He did the people of Noah’s Ark, and the people Of Gamore when they would not listen to Noah and Lot.

cheryl
#25. February 12th, 2007, at 8:58 PM.

Its only right that we forgive even though its awful difficult at times but we are all sinners I know I am and time and time again God Loves me, listens to me, and forgives me ALWAYS if God can why cant we if we love him? I Its funny how God gives you messages just when you need them I was looking for some lyrics to a song a ended up at this site ironically Im going thru a issue myself and he must have wanted me to see this but I know what is meant to happen will be I can stay strong , move on and be healed

Isn’t God Gr8! Thank the Lord

LadyAME
#26. February 13th, 2007, at 9:57 AM.

I love this topic. I am not a “preacher” but the LORD has given me many “words” from time to time on this topic. FORGIVENESS is so powerful! It can introduce you to the MASTER in new and special ways. HE not only heals sickness in our bodies but HE heals relationships. HE can heal your family’s generational curses, HE can heal your marriage. The key is FORGIVENESS. It is wonderfully freeing!!! Try JESUS!! Try FORGIVENESS!! You’ll find love and healing for the spirit.

teresa villanueva
#27. February 18th, 2007, at 2:12 AM.

wow this artical was really out there for everyone. GOD BLESS EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU. if any have any type of anger or just felling down just remember your not alone. this is what can undersand and my point of this artical. i think this th most importent.

James David O’Neill
#28. February 18th, 2007, at 6:48 AM.

Hi all, greetings from Ireland.
Enjoying your site. The one about the passed is very good. Perhaps, your could include a comment that I heard from a man that was recovering from depression, He said ” You can not drive a car at 60 miles a hour while looking in the rear view mirrow” . Keep up the good work.
God Bless,
James

James David O’Neill
#29. February 18th, 2007, at 6:51 AM.

Hi all,

You can forgive and let the situation not bother you but you must not forget the lessons that that experience gave you.
God Bless,
James

jfycedmidr
#30. March 14th, 2007, at 6:59 PM.

Hi! Very nice site! Thanks you very much! afkioprovyseg

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#31. March 15th, 2007, at 6:06 PM.

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Inez
#32. December 31st, 2007, at 12:54 PM.

I have just started to see this website and I have found very interesting. The articles I have read are truly inspiring and have hit home. I wasn’t aware how much I needed this, but it is really making a difference in my heart.
Thank you and keep sending these kind of messesages.

Bill Hamm
#33. February 16th, 2008, at 1:23 PM.

Thank you for sending me that lovely message about forgiveness. What a coincedence that tomorrow evening I am leading a creative worship celebration at our church with a team of other lay members. I wrote the service and will be delivering the messages. The first about healing and forgiveness will include a guided meditaion which will bring those listening through a process of asking Christ to heal and forgive those things we offer to Him. The other is about the ‘priesthood of all beleivers’ and will be follwed by a pantomime I wrote called ‘Rx For Revival’ where a hurting person unloads their burdens to a friend who invites them to bring it to the foot of the cross, where Christ comes downs off and lifts them in praise. We then offer anointing with oil and end by carrying the light of Christ (candle) in silence outdoors and use it to burn the burdens we have written during worship.

Deirdre Oneal
#34. January 9th, 2009, at 8:59 AM.

hi
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good luck

Yvonne
#35. September 8th, 2009, at 7:31 AM.

Absolutely a perfect music that gives inner peace for yourself. Listen to the music of Kim Clement, the modern prophet. Check this site : Kim Clement

Nathan
#36. May 4th, 2011, at 2:06 PM.

Challenging stuff!

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